Search: Posts Made By: Don Sims
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Forum: Humor
Yesterday, 12:22 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Arrow If a parsley farmer gets sued, can they garnish...

If a parsley farmer gets sued, can they garnish his wages?
Forum: Humor
Yesterday, 12:21 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Unhappy Robert Johnson, a CEO for a large corporation, is...

Robert Johnson, a CEO for a large corporation, is arrested and sentenced to 25 years in prison for white collar crimes.

On his first day behind bars, Robert nervously walks into the Chow Hall at...
Forum: Humor
Yesterday, 12:16 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Question Einstein and Newton are in a bar. Einstein says...

Einstein and Newton are in a bar.
Einstein says to Newton, "I've found mathematically that as an object travels faster and faster, it experiences time lower and is squished in the direction parallel...
Forum: Humor
05-24-2022, 10:23 AM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Post The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula...

The invisible man, the wolf man, and Dracula played poker.

They tried to get the mummy to play but he had no skin in the game.

The invisible man tried to bluff but people saw right through him....
Forum: Humor
05-23-2022, 12:00 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

info Some yttrium-barium-copper oxide walks into a...

Some yttrium-barium-copper oxide walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "We don't serve superconductors here."

It leaves without resistance.
Forum: Humor
05-23-2022, 11:56 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Thumbs up Last night my girlfriend was complaining that I...

Last night my girlfriend was complaining that I never listen to herÖ or something like that.
Forum: Humor
05-23-2022, 11:55 AM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Question A new guy got a job in a big corporation. ...

A new guy got a job in a big corporation.

One day, he took up the phone and accidentally called the CEO's office.

"*Bring me coffee!*"

"**Do you know who you're talking to?"** he heard a...
Forum: Humor
05-23-2022, 11:50 AM
Replies: 0
Views: 25
Posted By Don Sims

Exclamation New Bond Dress

So, James Bond retired and a new 007 took his place. She had trained all her life for this role, and was eager to do her duty for queen and country.

Her first day on the job, she was introduced to...
Forum: Humor
05-22-2022, 12:09 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Arrow In college, I plan to study food science,...

In college, I plan to study food science, specializing in carbonated beverages. My dad always wanted me to become a fizzicist.
Forum: Humor
05-22-2022, 12:05 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

info A man approached a very beautiful woman in a...

A man approached a very beautiful woman in a large supermarket and said, "I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"

"Why do you want to talk to me?"...
Forum: Humor
05-21-2022, 12:02 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Angry "Hydrogen monoxide! Hydrogen monoxide! Hydrogen...

"Hydrogen monoxide! Hydrogen monoxide! Hydrogen monoxide!", shouted Santa.

Asking a chemistry teacher to play Santa this year seemed to have backfired.
Forum: Humor
05-21-2022, 11:59 AM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

info Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a...

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation toward the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
Forum: Humor
05-21-2022, 11:57 AM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Thumbs up An American walks into an Irish pub. He says to...

An American walks into an Irish pub. He says to the patrons, "I'll bet $500 that none of you can drink 10 pints of Guinness in 10 minutes."

People raise their heads but ignore the absurd bet and...
Forum: Humor
05-20-2022, 01:10 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Exclamation The last thing I want to do is hurt you; but itís...

The last thing I want to do is hurt you; but itís still on the list.
Forum: Humor
05-20-2022, 01:08 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

info A grandmother was surprised when she wakes up to...

A grandmother was surprised when she wakes up to a cup of coffee from her 8 year old grandson.

She gulped down the most bitter coffee she has ever tasted but she downs it all because she wants her...
Forum: Humor
05-19-2022, 12:19 PM
Replies: 0
Views: 53
Posted By Don Sims

Build Review Easy fix

A soap factory had a problem. They sometimes shipped empty boxes without the bar inside. This challenged their perceived quality with the buyers and distributors.

Understanding how important these...
Forum: Humor
05-19-2022, 12:16 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Arrow My friend asked why I always talked quietly. I...

My friend asked why I always talked quietly. I told them it was because I didn't want corporations spying on me.

They laughed, I laughed, Alexa laughed...
Forum: Humor
05-19-2022, 12:10 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Red face Have you heard of the upcoming movie where a time...

Have you heard of the upcoming movie where a time traveler gets transformed into a chicken?

It's called Bawk to the Future.
Forum: Humor
05-19-2022, 12:08 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Question If sound cannot travel in a vacuum, why are...

If sound cannot travel in a vacuum, why are vacuums so noisy?
Forum: Humor
05-18-2022, 12:25 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Unhappy I opened both my water and my electricity bills...

I opened both my water and my electricity bills at once.

Needless to say, I was shocked.
Forum: Humor
05-18-2022, 12:23 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Thumbs up Always borrow money from a pessimist. Theyíll...

Always borrow money from a pessimist. Theyíll never expect it back.
Forum: Humor
05-18-2022, 12:21 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

info I was doing some shopping at the supermarket and...

I was doing some shopping at the supermarket and had a cart full of groceries and a lovely bouquet of flowers. Coincidentally, my wife walked in just as I was checking out.

She noticed the flowers...
Forum: Humor
05-18-2022, 12:19 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Red face I posted a really good time travel joke next week.

I posted a really good time travel joke next week.
Forum: Humor
05-17-2022, 12:32 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Question Why can't you purchase minerals by the gallon? ...

Why can't you purchase minerals by the gallon?

They only come in quartz!
Forum: Humor
05-17-2022, 12:29 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

Exclamation Just burned 2,000 calories. Thatís the last time...

Just burned 2,000 calories. Thatís the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Forum: Humor
05-17-2022, 12:27 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Lightbulb A woman just had twins, a boy and a girl, and she...

A woman just had twins, a boy and a girl, and she hasn't decided yet what to name them.

Coincidentally her long lost uncle has just come into town. The mother decides, because it's such a special...
Forum: Humor
05-16-2022, 01:18 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 663
Posted By Don Sims

People who use selfie sticks really need to have...

People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good, long look at themselves.
Forum: Humor
05-16-2022, 01:16 PM
Replies: 28
Yep
Views: 394
Posted By Don Sims

Post There's a beer convention in town, and all the...

There's a beer convention in town, and all the CEOs from all the beer companies are there. During a break between seminars, a few of them went down to the hotel bar for a drink.

The Anheuser Busch...
Forum: Humor
05-16-2022, 01:10 PM
Replies: 177
Views: 7,470
Posted By Don Sims

Before invention of electricity Judge: I...

Before invention of electricity

Judge: I sentence you to death by the acoustic chair.
05-16-2022, 12:17 PM
Replies: 5,518
Views: 1,175,707
Posted By Don Sims

Welcome to the site!

Welcome to the site!
Showing results 1 to 30 of 500
 


 
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